Alone

Today, I woke up feeling strangely depressed. I didn't even have much to do today, in terms of homework. I guess the stress was finally replaced by "true emotion," as dramatic as that sounds.

After I wasted a couple of hours, I realized why I wasn't feeling as chipper as usual. I think it all has to do with how I'm completely alone in my own neighbourhood and my own city. I felt like an island, surrounded by sea with no neighbours in sight. And not even a touristy, lush, tropical island either; more like an ugly, bare rock outcropping that nobody goes to, like this:

Thinking back on it, I've never really had that much of a purpose for friends that live right next door. Who needs such people when I've got them in other areas? Of course, today I realized that these other cities are pretty far. I don't want to go all the way out to Vancouver or Surrey everytime I went to get bubble tea with somebody.

So, after 3 years of living here, I still haven't really made a good friend in my neighbourhood. Hm. I suppose I had a couple, but they were kind of lame in the end... But it's hard to meet people when I don't go to school in Burnaby. I can't exactly just wait around on my street and hope that somebody will come along with an opportunity to befriend them. When you're little, you obviously made friends by joining other kids in play. Big kids don't play on the streets like they used to anymore. Well, not in the same way at least.

I suppose I'll just have to live with being alone. It's funny how yesterday really made me realize all of this. I wish my friends lived within closer proximity to me. I wish I could have some that I could jog with, or go get bubble tea with, or just waste random time with. Wishes are only wishes though. On the other hand, if I had them, maybe then I'd have (slightly) more a life... Hm.

When it all comes down to it, I wish I had a car.