Given the above, how many times does our carelessness come back to bite us from behind? Take Facebook, for example. I'm pretty sure it caused quite an outrage with the whole private policy change a few months ago with photos. A lot of people seemed to be suddenly conscious of themselves when they discovered that photographs of them snogging their ex-lovers or getting wasted at parties could suddenly be up for grabs by third-party organizations. I know that the policy was introduced at a time when Facebook was peaking in popularity, but what if it had been in the original Terms and Agreements? Would anybody have batted an eye at that clause? Probably not, and this would have thus been their own fault.
Today, something careless that I did came back to, if I were to put it colloquially, bite me in the ass. It was but the day before when I suddenly realized that I was actually a U1 student at McGill, not a U0 student like I had originally thought. An explanation: in Quebec, high school continues for most youth until Grade 11, when they then enter a CEGEP program that's the equivalent of Grade 12 and the first year of university. Apparently, McGill registers a recipient of the IB Diploma as having completed an equivalent program to the first year of university: the U0 year. As a result, I'm now technically a second year student. Bizarre, no? My mind was totally blown; mind = blown for sure.
Unfortunately, this doesn't really change much. Except for Biology, which I have credits from, I still have a bunch of other prequisites, such as Chemistry, Physics and Mathematics to worry about. It's apparently possible for me to graduate in 3 years, but I'd probably have to do summer courses as well as overload all my semesters, which definitely doesn't sound too appetizing to me.
All of this has simply been mind-blowing for me these past few days. I've tried to research it extensively at work, but it felt like a sudden rush was overcoming my mind with panic and confusion. What courses do I need? Do I have enough? Which courses sound interesting and beneficial towards my GPA?
Of course, there is also a much greater issue at risk. When I applied for McGill last December, I put Cell Biology and Anatomy as my first-choice program and Microbiology and Immunology as a second, thinking "whatever" with it. As a result, when I was accepted for the former in February and the latter in mid-May, I completely disregarded the latter and declined it, accepting the offer for the former, easy entry program instead. Of course, therein lies the problem: I didn't know that Microbiology and Immunology was something that most people apply for after their first U0 year at McGill. I didn't know that people actually get put on waiting lists and eventually get rejected from the program. I didn't know that it was actually a bit of a big deal. I didn't know, I didn't know, I didn't know.
Why didn't I know? Because of my own incompetence and foolishness: I never actually bothered to look at what I thought I was getting myself into, and now I simply feel... stupid. Stupid and blonde, whom I've had a brush with. I know I can just re-apply after my next year, but I can't help but feel like I've wasted my first year at McGill when I could've gone further if I were in the actual program. Most 100-level courses are applicable for the vast majority of programs anyways, so I suppose it's not a hugely significant loss. Still, I feel like I've been given the both the Gold and Silver medals at the Olympics, and I ended up accepting the Silver because I thought it looked shinier or something.
Furthermore, who's to say that I'll even be able to get in at the end of next year? Like I said, hopefuls wait for months on waiting lists and never get in. I highly doubt I'll be able to impress anybody at this time next year - I'll just be another student to them, not the IB student with the (hopelessly) predicted mark of 45. Wow, I sound cocky there. I guess I can't help how I feel and what I think; no point in censoring myself too much. Yet again, something that I had an advantage in, but ended up wasting.
Of course, I have nobody to blame but myself. I am the cause of my own misfortune, and I am also the cause to the subsequent reaction towards its discovery. Me, me, me. Me, myself & I. I hate being told I'm wrong. It's not that I'm not open to new ideas or being corrected. Well, to be honest, I think it's a combination of that as well as a fear of making mistakes. I suppose this is a pretty big one in my head, at least.
I guess this is the first real blog post that I've made in a long time. Self, welcome back to shamelessly and openly spilling out my thoughts to nobody. I really have no idea why, but I just feel this imminent sadness coming from within me tonight after I realized my major mistake. I'm probably being melodramatic and overplaying this entire situation, but I guess I can't really help it if that's how I feel right now. Whenever I feel sad, I tell myself to stop being sad and be awesome instead. However, just being awesome isn't going to cut it this time, I'm afraid. I think a bit of intelligence would've been nice, as a matter of fact.
I know it's a common stereotype that's probably not entirely true. People say that Asians are bad drivers and women should be homemakers, but they've gained those stereotypes for a reason. In this case, I've adopted another: this officially confirms that I am blonde at heart. New style change when I get to McGill - all those in favour?
